Another post that is right from the roots of my thoughts and my li'll immature experiences...
My weekdays are turning into a new definition of loathing my work and changing my mind every moment. Well friends i know i sound quiet a bit confused but this whole maze of figuring out whether m liking my work or not is driving me hell crazy...It leaves me amazed, surprised and shocked all at the same time...i spent my 3 years thinking,loving and running around this sole subject named retail, read almost all the books stacked in the library and now this past one month has completely turned my love into hatred. My thoughts keep on drifting towards the other more interesting things existing in this world like enjoying my weekends off work with full utilization and loving my friends and their existence around me and the joy of coming home to someone who waits for you and loves you like a new day is to start. So many things have mushroomed up like everything i go for is not worth it, the joy of getting exhausted in the local train and sleeping on the shoulder of a completely strange person, the joy of hunting for more exciting things to do in the 1 hr of lunch, standing on the door and feeling yourself go free in the train, saying a hi to the engine driver, hunting for good looks on the station....and what not...I still wonder how do people spend their whole lives travelling,maybe they develop the knack of exploring something new everyday they travel,maybe this is the surprise. I am still learning the skill ;)
Why not even I like this city and the bond it ties between every resident of this land, you may never know the lady across but she maybe the one to keep a seat for you everyday, maybe you don't know the cook in the restaurant but he maybe the one to get happy everytime you enter his place to eat, maybe the wada pao wala is a stranger but he'll ask you for more because he knows you are hungry....this city really has a lot to give and share....I have enjoyed every bit of the li'll things i have experienced till now, the sorrows, the silence, the love, the joy, the roses and the lily's it has given me, the ocean that has inspired me to achieve my dreams to the rains that have inspired me to wash away all my old memories and start again from a new green land..... :)
I still maybe a fool, an immature and a bigger confused wreck than anybody else but i love to be so because this city loves me like that and is always ready to teach me more.....
"Where words end their shadows, where the sunlight leaves its trails......i wander in those skies of hope that one day all my hearts desires will come true".
I have heard people analysing the anonymity of life and its journey, seen many of them taking a step further and making people realize what worth their lives stand for. But confessing to the roots of my heart, i have always thought in a bit different way about life.....People turn 20 and then 30 and then 40 and so on, some remember the faint memoirs of their early lives,their childhood, their adoloscence and some dont. So why do they want to spend some of the precious moments of their lives realizing what they have been, what they could have been, and now what can they do. For me time and joy are both faces of the same coin, time teaches you to face pain and joy teaches you to wait for the pain to leave. Someday my message bottle will reach accross the shore and all my desires written in it will come true. "Hope" is such a big whirlpool that it does not even let us think that we are half dead draining into its hands. But still it saves time and helps you to sail accross sorrows. I have a small poem to share with you all..maybe i can touch some deep desire in your heart that needs to drain in this big whirlpool of hope atleast once....
Search the vanity and you will see her
Wrapped in tussar, intact with her perfume
Unfold the shadows slowly
And you'll hear her sing, her long lost melancholies
Stay in her closet and she will show you
The moonlight of her so called destiny
That always stayed tumbling through gushing emotions
and when you know its time to leave her forever,
Just tell he I have long lost my soul.....
I left it near her when I last unwrapped her shadows
Tell her I have lost my dreams
I left them in her tiny hands the last time when I heard her sing...
Maybe if you see you deep desire waking up...just let her know that you are there to love her....
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